As we wrap up a fun ride in 9U baseball this year, I can’t help but think about the reputation youth sports have gotten lately. I see posts about dads trying to live vicariously through their son and yelling at them after a bad game. I hear stories of fans screaming at each other or umpires because of a controversial call. I know some kids are reluctantly practicing 7 days a week just because their parents feel this is needed to stay ahead.
It’s true it is not difficult to find examples of why youth sports are getting a bad rap. But I think it’s time to also tell what the other side of youth sports can be if we as coaches, parents, and supporters celebrate and promote what youth sports are intended to be. The benefits of youth sports are endless but let’s highlight a few reminders on just how much these kids can grow through opportunities in youth sports.
Mindset matters:
People warned me and they were right – 9U baseball will be a rollercoaster ride of ups and downs. Both individuals and the team. One of the most important concepts our coaches focused on throughout the year was what bounce back mentality means. As an individual, they will strike out, walk batters, make errors. As a team, there will be times they underachieve. It’s inevitable. While the rollercoaster ride will have low moments, mindset often determines how long of a moment the rollercoaster ride stays down.
Bounce back mentality acknowledges struggles happen, but there’s always something you can do next to help your team. Bouncing back from a strikeout may mean cheering on the next guy up. Bouncing back from walking a hitter while pitching may look like taking a couple extra seconds to reset and take deep breaths to attack the next batter. The easy road is to let frustration take over and either get down on yourself or your team. Bounce back mentality allows these kids to practice responding to adversity in a variety of ways that transfer well beyond just what happens on a ballfield or a court.
Same goes for how our kids learn what success is. It’s so fun to experience winning a tournament and celebrating with your friends. Mindset keeps the high points of the rollercoaster a little while longer. These kids learn when success comes, enjoy it, but also realize we still must come to practice the following week to work hard and grow. The need to grow does not take a break just because we experience a little success. Learning this humble mindset allows these kids in life to enjoy success while also realizing work ethic is consistently needed.
How you talk to one another matters:
The opportunity to point fingers and shift blame is endless in 9U baseball. There’s constantly learning moments (what I choose to call errors, strikeouts, etc. 😊). As 9-year-olds this finger pointing is easy. What’s not easy is choosing to have your teammates’ backs even through hard times. It reminds me of the saying true character is shown during difficult times. It’s easy to be a great teammate when someone is playing well and we’re winning, but let’s see how they show up for the team when times get tough.
There were plenty of moments where we saw the pointing of fingers, the frustration with another teammate, or the disappointment of coming up short. In those moments of difficulty lie the opportunity to coach on what it means to have your team’s back. Not just when times are easy and going well but when we see times of difficulty. During these times there can be a tipping point where either the team starts pointing fingers or they make the more difficult decision to see past the struggle of the moment and tell their teammates that they have each other’s back.
It’s hard to consistently show up and support your team as an adult, let alone a 9-year-old. The more opportunity these kids are put in situations of difficulty and get to practice how to support one another through tough times, the more this habit of having their team’s back gets engrained in their DNA. This idea of supporting one another through the rollercoaster of baseball can be transferred to the rollercoaster ride we face in life. These kids that practice this mindset and find their authentic ways to support others are also the kids you see opening doors for others, helping a kid up from falling at the playground, or being leaders in the classroom.
Leadership needs to show up both in good and bad times and these moments of struggle allow these kids opportunities to practice their authentic way of helping themselves and others.
Take time to enjoy the scenery on the journey:
With all the tournaments we were fortunate enough to play in this season it can become easy to slip into focusing solely on results. How many games did we win? How many runs did we score? Baseball is an analytical game and there are always results to assess.
Many of the best parts about youth sports are far from anything analytics can tell us. As I reflect on the season some of the greatest moments came when the kids were just being kids and enjoying the ride.
When we had a couple of walk-off wins this year, I recall the rush of emotion shown by the team running out to give each other hugs and high fives so excited for one another. When we had breaks in between games I laugh back at how many times I had to yell over at the kids to quit wrestling with one another, playing on the nearby playground, or just running around like maniacs. I loved driving and looking in my rearview mirror and seeing my son smiling because he was so excited to go to baseball to see his friends and compete.
I value those tough losses and still see the disappointed faces when we regroup as a team to talk about how we bounce back and learn from tough moments. I cherish the last week of practice when our team was begging to have additional optional practices so we could play more ball together. There are countless moments along the journey that are easy to take for granted but really provide the experience we cherish for years to come.
The magic is in the journey and while we can get caught up easily in being results oriented, loving the process can enrich the journey even more.
For every Instagram post you see of an umpire being yelled at in a youth sports game, remember there are plenty of coaches out there teaching lessons well beyond the sport to help your kid grow. For every parent you see extending their kid way too far, there are countless parents encouraging their kid to have fun, work hard, and be a good coachable teammate. Don’t let outliers shape the narrative and blind us to the countless development opportunities youth sports can provide.
Stay focused on the benefits that can come with youth sports including learning how to persevere, leadership skills, what it means to be part of a team, handling adversity, learning to be coachable, and the list goes on. It’s on us as parents, coaches, and supporters to create an environment where these kids can grow. See the good in what youth sports can bring in our youth and continue to focus in driving this positive development.
Thank you to the CANI organization for all your hard work creating an environment that centers around developing these kids well beyond just the game of baseball!